Kai Chronicles

Eating, exploring and enjoying life

Are you full of crap? I bet you are



Have at seat. ©dirtyboxface

I recently researched bowel health for an article and interviewed colon hydrotherapist, Sue Twiggs. When I first saw her website, she said something to the effect of ‘the most miserable people in the world have improper elimination’. I see the website has been updated since but she does say this now:

It is normal to have a bowel movement 2 – 4 times per day, 2.5 % of the world’s population do, therefore most of us are full of shit.

I also love her description of the Constipated Person:

• Attitude to life always rushing never time for yourself, or your bowel…ignore toilet call, lose gut brain connection.
• Accumulation of emotional baggage unable to discuss/display emotions, holding onto the crap in our lives. Can also be sub-conscious or childhood memories baggage.
• Fear by letting go of faeces will bring up past unhappiness or hurt, so holding on to crap again. Amazing results are achieved with colonics as one lets go.

Are you miserable, tired, anxious, and stressed to the max? 

If you answered yes, I’d like to bet that you are also constipated.

And being constipated is no fun. Not for you or anyone around you.

I remember once working with a girl who said she hadn’t pooped in over two months!! It was way back when I was only 20 – a time I never, ever talked about my toileting habits so I didn’t press her for more details. I was horrified that she was openly talking about this to her co-workers. I actually didn’t start to loosen up (wink wink) until my 30s, and after I was married. Yes, that’s right. I was married before I openly talked, even to my husband about elimination. And I clearly remember being ridiculously embarrassed to tell him that I wasn’t feeling well because I was constipated. Now look at me. You cannot shut me up about poop.

My concern for bowel health got very serious back in 2011 when my 53 year-old sister, Virginia suddenly died. It happened only 5 weeks after cancer was found in her colon and liver. For that reason and others, I took a good long look at my health and diet. As this blog documents, I’m constantly on and off health kicks in attempts to manage my chronic sinus condition, stay fit and have a body that can fight against cancer. And that’s why I am currently having weekly colonics.

I had my first ever colonic in September 2014 when I took a much-needed break from my daily life and went to Bali, alone. I documented my 3-day detox. You can read about Day 1 and my very first colonic here.

Before I went to Bali, I was having some serious anxiety on a near daily basis. At one point, I was so sick with stomach pain and acid-reflux, I was put on medication. Read about that nightmare here.

But something amazing happened after my colonic and mini detox. My anxiety went away. For about 7 months, I felt like a new person. I was a new person. My colon hydrotherapist in Bali suggested these ways to poop more:

  • Hydrate
  • Make time
  • Squat (not in the woods!! Just have your knees higher than your hips. Rest your feet on a rubbish bin or some books as your sit on the loo)

For up to 14 months after that trip, I drank a litre of water each morning before anything else passed my lips. I also exercised regularly and had a fairly healthy diet. Constipation was a thing of the past. I was pooping up to 3 times each day.

Then I broke my water rules. I’d only drink 1/2 a litre before my coffee and exercise stopped altogether (actually, that stopped first, and not long after, the anxiety and stress returned). Then in January this year,  I moved to the South West of Western Australia and with that a slew of personal problems, the worst one being ALLERGIES. That was the catalyst for more colonics.

I had to do something. I was so sick and miserable that life was looking pretty bleak. Very bleak. But not anymore. I have been doing a lot to help my health so it’s hard to say if the colonics are the only reason I am getting better but here’s a few amazing things that I know for sure is due to the colonics.

  • I’m eating less
  • My sugar and bread cravings are gone
  • I am choosing healthier foods (I was comfort eating a lot!!)
  • I’m drinking more water
  • I’m feeding my gut pro-biotics – supplements and fermented foods daily
  • My mood has drastically improved
  • I have little to no anxiety
  • I’m having daily bowel movements
  • I’ve lost (about) a kilo
  • My muffin top has shrunk

I’m going for my third colonic in as many weeks tomorrow and I must say, I’m looking forward to it. I know talking about this is a very personal and touchy subject for some. Some people (many are my friends) would never in a million years have a colonic. Before you shut the lid on the topic, I urge you to read Scott W Webb’s book, Inside Poop. It’s an easy read and he’s very switched on and funny too!!

If you are serious about your health, you will be serious about your colon.  Scott W Webb says that being healthy today means looking after your colon. I totally believe him. Do you? Or do you think we are full of shit?

Be brave. Leave a comment.


Author: Jennifer Morton

Perth Travel Writer | Photographer | Canadian | Nomad | Home Cook | Glutton | Serial Planner

6 thoughts on “Are you full of crap? I bet you are

  1. This is awesome! Can I forward to my colon hydrotherapist?

    All the best, Christine


  2. I can relate to all this. I have just had my fourth colonic and will have my fifth next week and the sixth the week after. I have chronic constipation. My entire life, well as far back as I can remember (I’m assuming I crapped as much as other babies), I have been constipated. I have discussed this problem with numerous doctors and got no help – “eat more veggies, take Metamucil” etc even after telling them that doesn’t work for me, I get worse. Then, thanks completely to Jenn and her blogs, I finally found a lady in my town who does colonics and I had my first one this year on January 29th. She has helped me more in six weeks than 30 years of doctors have. I am not regular yet, but I am eliminating much, much more than ever in my life – almost every day since my first colonic. Today’s was the best release yet – I actually felt very happy as I was eliminating. This euphoria came over me and I couldn’t stop smiling. Don’t think about it any longer – go get a colonic. I am also taking a daily probiotic, digestive enzymes, oil pulling, and eating 12 Sea Buckthorn berries a day but I am giving all the credit to the colonics. Everything else is to keep me going once I start going on my own. We also added Bowen on March 7th and that seems to be helping too. I feel so great!

  3. Wow! That is great news. So glad you are feeling better. I should have mentioned in the post that most people carry 2-4kgs of waste in their bowels. That’s a lot!! Have you lost weight too? I’ve lost about a kilo and my tummy bulge is half the size! I better add that to my listed results. Yay for colonics!!

  4. We were only talking about this at work today. I’ve never had issues with “blockages”, shall we say, but sometimes the opposite. I didn’t think I had too much I was holding onto, but recently had a bout of salmonella & now feel great- which is why we were talking about colonics. If that makes sense. There. I had the guts to leave a comment 😉

    • Thanks for reading and having the courage to publicly talk about your bowels. I’m glad to hear that it’s been a topic of discussion at work too. I just came from a ” great release” colonic!! Wow, I feel awesome. Not “euphoric” like, Christine but pretty damn happy.

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